It's my life

halo everybody
today it seems so boring
feel like sweating up my body
but it seems to be e same old lame thing

Damn! i feel so bored today! In e morning I woke up at 11 am in e morning, and 1st sms i've got is from girl! yay! It's her! Her birthday celebration was yesterday though her bday is today... hmm.. and I didnt go to her party. I feel odd why she didnt invite me. Anyway, at least we talk for quite sometimes. I dun dare to ask her why she didnt ask me. But I got one gd news! she invited me to e BBQ in chalet in the afternoon when she smsed me hehehe.. its on 17th this friday! boy am i excited bout tis ^_^ hope nothing bad will happen :S

In e morning as usual i logged into my comp... saw Shaf. Talked to him. Then halfway I made my status to be 'away'.
Play gun bound... then feel not good coz so hard to get money. then changed to civ3. play till halfway, keep winning, then feel bored again, Changed to sims. Play a family till i get sick of the game.
Change to wc3 and go bnet. but it seems so 'dry'. It's w whole ol lame game again. no fun! after the whole thing, went back online, talked to sunario and called him big nene, then keep silence. back to shafiq again, asking on how to operate stuff, etc.
in the nite, i slept at 3 am, after watching contact (thanx to shaf's advice) and after playing my game ^_^

Well, friends coem and go, love may end in a river, but meet again at the mouth. I feel so terrible today... Coz i'm gonna leave s'pore 20th Oct... leaving to Indonesia. i'm gonna miss everybody, my frens, my loved ones, and my family. well, u cant win em all can u? there's alwasy peak an valley in life.
oh well, anyway today's everything's simple. Woke up at 2... late ya? damn yesterday i slept at 3 am ++( Singapore time)... lol. Ok, Shaf promised me to teach me how to cycle. Since 3.00 till 4.48 he teached me how to ride a bike (man seem so humilating for a guy in my age hu dunno how to ride a bike) Hey sumbody gotta start somewhere ya? After e lesson I treated him to a movie, as a token of appreciation for being such gd fren, and for teaching me a thing or two. We watched Pirates of carribean. lol... u should see the movie area... it was almost deserted.... only 5 ppl watched in e cinema, including us. hhahaahha it was hella funny and nice show. Actually it was my 2nd time watching it.
Wats happening while watching movie: Shirlyn went to dentist to make braces ^_^ ahahahaha wonder how she looks like later. Dunnowat e hell happen to Andy, probably studying for his chem tomorow. Well, i dun study coz i dun care hahaha.... anyway im leaving to America soon...oh well.. there goes e feeling again. So sad
After e movie it was already 8.30... we went home using mrt, separately, and i feel so sad, feel like crying, coz today's maybe e last time seeing him. He's going for NS. i'm gonna miss a guy who is so kind and understanding, comprehend computer stuff, ability to teach me to cycle, friendly, talented in arts, etc.. argh so many things he has in his life. I feel like im losing sumbody so priceless.
Anyhow, as i'm inside e train, saw him waving him, then i feel like im not going to see him till very long time later. Actually feel ike giving him a big hug for begin such a gd fren, but too many ppl, ppl might think we r gays hahahaahah...
Upon going home, i'm listening to so many sad songs, oh man i almost cried. i'm gonna miss everybody here;Shafiq, Shirlyn, Andy, ZL, Song Yu, the gang ( CG, Richard, Russell, Diane, Ahmad, Clarence, Eugene, Derrick, Kexin, etc), and many more.
OMG e listening to is a sad song.. man now e tears are really flowing out, haha... nvr feel like tat for a long time. so emotional now :S
Hmm.. wanna sleep now bfore i go any further. Shirlyn called me boy fren and wishes me gd nite
so happy!! and at same time sad


sapro' darti un'emozione
sara' tuo quello che ho
e dovunque tu sarai io ci saro'

Iwill give you an emotion, and yours to mine, but forever, I will be together with you.

Morning, i woke up at 6.00 am.. going sch to have my last exam. and i was thinking of it as my happy day. Used taxi to sch coz it was raining very hard. Boy.. the whole taxi fare was $11.00 danti so ex... coz i hav to booked e taxi.
As i entered e sch compound.... 6.55. nobody was there yet. too early. Went into LT4, and it was empty and dark.played a few tunes at the piano, so that at least i can play for my last time using e college lecture theatre piano. hehe... tehn start crowing around e exam area preparing for exams... hmm.. eveybody was nervous except me. coz i dun care hehehe.. anyway im going off soon ^_^
e exam was fairly ok.
after tat andy and henry folowed me to my house to watch american pie wedding. Hmm.... after reaching my house, instead of watching they played wc3... lame ppl -_-
we then leave e house at 11.00 am... going to queensway to go sum shopping plc.. actually i tot we were going to do sumthing... instead they lead me to a gang of rugby. they spend e whole time buying sport shoes for their equipments. tats ok... then andy and henry kp disturbing me and saying im useless, disturbing me... and tehy went overboard. they really pissed me off. oh well... anyway, i try to forget it. i'm still quite pissed by them... a slight anger perhaps. e whole day i feel glum. i feel so out of e grp. jianlin was there too, gd thing he's not tat insulting.

well, i went home earlier, wanting to cool off myself. perhaps i've been too much myself. today's not my dayi guess.... i blew it. my girl shirlyn consoled me a while ^_^
oh well, after reached home i sent andy an apology... and guess wat i sent earlier message tat was spose for shirlyn to andy... die
blah hope he not angry instead. its my fault too that i wanna follow em. blah a really rotten day it is. after tat went for a shot in photoshop... for my passport pic.
The whole day after i was playing... Rise of nation (RON) which shaf intro me. well, kinda fun but after sumtimes ull get bored over e saem ol' thing. hehe...
9.45 pmp
hmm.. talking to ppl in msn.. till 11++ tehn i go slp. man wat a day. oh well, hope nothing worse gonna go around. tomorow will be ed ay my gd fren shaf will turn to a six pack man hahaha....
gd nite everybody!

May God bless everyday of my life...

on e same day, 14th oct, at 11.45, i m crying right now, over my very gd frens. e fren hu has been so gd to me. a fren hu had given me such great care, and friendship. if only i could repay him sumway, sumhow. oh man.. cant stop e tear flowing from my eyes. i shall always remember you, shaf, for being such gd fren.
how i wish we can hav sum more time to get know each otehr more. too bad were given such short time. (boy, im a guy and im crying, crazy huh?)


here's what he wrote for me:


"I would really like to thank you for being such a good friend this past month. When I message you, I was not even expecting us to know each other for this long. Or that you want to meet me to play with my game. I was actually taken back. Ha-ha. But it’s a good think you took the trouble to ask me. When on Saturday you sms me, asking me if I want to try Civilization 3, I was once again surprised. When you asked me for the second time, I know you’ll be a really good friend. And my predictions were right. ^_^ . You are a good friend. Even though we are going to be miles and miles apart, you will always be my friend. You’re the first friend I know from face-pic to be this good. Your kind of people is very difficult to find and I am glad that I message you in face-pic. These last one month of my life as a civilian has been well spent. Thanks to you. I couldn’t have asked for a better month.

Good luck in your studies in America. I wish you all the very best in your future endeavors and whatever you are going to go through. Try to retain as much Asian values you have in you when you’re in America. Once again, all the best.



You've always been the only one
Who treasured me for me
Around you I didn't have to lie
I could be who i wanted to be

You'd be right there beside me.
When the world was caving in.
You'd hold my hand and guide me
In you I finally found a friend

Whenever I was down.
I knew I could always count on you
When I felt like ending it all
It was you who helped me through

And no matter what happens between us
We will always make it in the end
Because in you I found something special
In you I found my best friend


Friends Forever,

Shafiq Rahman"




tahnx for everything man... i'll miss you. no matter where we are, we'll still be very gd fren. thanx for everything once again, the friendshipz, the computer lesson, for teaching me to ride a bike, the smile, the care, the jokes, and many more. you r priceless. not many frens exist like you. May God bless you, forever. Gd bye. (OMG i'm smiling and crying like a baby now)

It's now 6.18 in the morning. Today's e least day i get to sms to shaf, my gd buddy. Oh well, both of us seem happy trying to laugh, consoling each other. and it was e last sms he sent me "i'm in camp! byebye! And dad gave me hundred " hahah.. he seemed excited. man tell u guys, he's a magnificient guy who really understands his frens well. so tast e last message i received from him. May God bless you wherever you are.

I will always treasure the mail u've sent me yesterday, and e last message u sent me.
[img:43721]

haha.. with shaf gone i'm less of one person to talk to. man.. gonna miss him. anyway, i still got Shirlyn and Andy, my best pal and my best girlfren ^_^
oh well, nothing much today, juz packing up my stufff from my table, preparing things to be thrown away and to be sent to america. at same time my gramps keep complaining about e cap at my central unit, saying its going to detach again. damnit.. no choice but to phone e company. in e end it didnt work as they said e cap is of no use for e comp. see? im right!
hehehe... i win! (feeling evil)
shirlyn today told me that her family gotta go to malaysia.... so disappointing. man.. cant meet her again. But i know she still love me. i still love her. she's what she is. anyway, we r not bf gf yet ^_^
promised to be one when time comes. Not old enough
bleh.. from BBQ cancelled to outing (she said tat yesterday)
and now its cancelled.. wonderbar!
oh well, fate prefers us to be this way. Come what may, i will love you till my dying day.

As for Andy, tid morning he seem not to be in gd mood. man.. tried to talk to him but he keep silence... i hav feeling tat hes angry with wat happened yesterday. man... i hope tat wont break our relation. we've worked so hard smoulder our chain of frenship. i dun want to break it now.
tis whole day i was busy. morning, my time was filled with task of withdrawal from sch. dang... so ma fan. i can only say 1 word: samparakumiabarahut!!!
i tried apoligize through hp but.. oh well, he replied but of course, saying " hell ya! i failed everything!" oh man he failed every subs... damn! how i hope i can giv away my mark to him since im leaving anyway. but.. by the gods! tat is not allowed.

hmm.. feeling empty right now, thinking taht my migration to america is a bliss and bless. im eager to make new frens there. hey of course i wont make anymore gf. 1 is enuf. im faithful ^_^.... and also i would like to see awtas studying in america like hehe..
hm.. but at same time i thnk its a curse.... casting down my private emotion. man ive been feeling so sad nowadays. i;m gonna separate wif every frens here. im gonna miss u all. i love u all. i hope ill come back here again nexdt year for a visit.

Today was quite fun. We had our games ins ch.. i took part in general knowledge game. man.. lol.. welost so badly... i keep answering wrong one hahaha... damnit my knowledge is already too 'old'. hahaha..... well, at least we r not e worst
hmm..
after e game i went to e canteen and play e cello a while. it was fun its way of playing is sumthing liek of violin... except tat e way of stroking is reverse. I tried out e double bass too.. but too big. e bow is so big that i cant hold it properly. damn. then help the COs to pack up. i carried e cello ^_^ see? im so kind! hehehe.... tehn go disturb ZL a while hehe.. a very fun guy to mix with... hehe... e pic below... a one with 3 person in it... e middle guy is him. laughing is his speciality. hahaha... i love it when he laugh. seems tat it really spice up e surrounding environment, esp his sarcasm. a jerk, but a funny jerk, unlike sum really irritaing jerks hehe...
after tat we watched e performance put up by e tang quartet. they played well ya! their stroking, expression, and playing was wonderbar!
after e concert actually i was gonna go out wif shirlyn.. then sudenly she cant make it! >:|
damnit i hate cancellation. i was really looking forward for it. but too bad... i'm kind of in urgent. Then i follow Andy instead to e canteen... waiting for my time to go to SIR to mend my citizenship here. but godamnit...! at 2 when i phoned em they say not to come today. to hell wif em! >:* (@#$%&*@#%) damnit now tat its cancelled i hav nowhere to go... so no choice but to follow andy.
oh well... followed him to parkway.. to buy his stuff. hmm.. hes soo quiet... unlike his usual self. but.. of course ill expect tat since he got quite bad for his exam :S
but oh well.. wish him gd luck again, for future exam, and work harder, u hav my support andy!
he showed me around his childhood area, where he grew in tat plc, and led me to a place to eat laksa. wow! ttas one greatest laksa ive ever tasted! soooo much better than sch's laksa. tahnx man... u r e other very gd fren i have.. in fact u r one of e best.
man im gonna miss all my fen here... i love all my frens here, esp e few best ones...
another news: shirlyn broke her specs hahaah.. funny girl... suggested her to use contact lense instead. and shes wearing braces already hahaha.. wonder how she looks like ... hahaahha

As im hearing to e song 'Qing tian' by Jay zhou now, it reminds me again of Shafiq, one of my best buddy who sent me tis song, Shirlyn, a fan of Jay Zhou who really spends her time to make me so happy, and Andy, e guy hu is crazy and yet kind and understanding.
Thanx to 3 of u... e most precious ppl in my life! of course, not fogetting e rest, in cluding my gd buddy Zhao liang (ZL) e joker, my old singing partner Harmony, Henry e botak, Jianlin+ Dudley e gays ^_^ (kidding), Derrick+ Kexin, Richard, Choon Goan, Russell, Diane, Ahmad, Eugene, Clarence (which is e usual ol' gang), Febrianto+ Vegustian my gd indo frens, my fav cousin Dianto and Eka, Sufian my classmate, including Pei shan+ Fabious, Yuan Hong, Netty + Rashidah, Michelle+ Jing Xuan. Others also include Calvin, Ivan and Anastasia my gd neighbours, my old sch mate.... too many to list! Oh esp Qing Xiang, e guy really sacrificed his exams just to train me up (tahnx a lot and sorry bout it), a realyl great fren too!!
oh well, tats so far tat i can list. i'll update more later atnight. i need to go for my fren's bday dinner now (Harmony). Thanx to ya' all my pals!!! You guys make me soooo happy!! May God bless you all abundantly!! I love you all, once again!

seem tat after i reach home everything is back to normal. i dun feel tat sad anymore ^_^
oh well, anyway i bought Clay Aiken album. it's fabulous! u should try! nothing much to say. Monday is my departure day, ahh.. how i wish i can turn back my time and rechoose my path.
oh well, Harmony's birhday was quite ok i guess. juz went for sum jap food.. and u should see her eat! we were in such hurry hahahaha.. we r still eating when e movie is starting, but in e end we made it in time. e shwo we watched was e..burndown.. eh.. erh.. sumthing down.. forgot e title oups :S
its quite nice :D
not bad... e main actor was e rock! e great wrerstler from WWE
anyway, after e movie i went home straight.. but she still going for another party with her frens at sum clubs... but i dun wan follow.. not my type of place.. and tomorow i still got sch, my last day of sch. must meet all my frens. for my gd fren,s i wan giv e ma big hug ^_^
ok gotta slp now tata!

Calvin, Ahmad, Amanda, Andy, Pei Shan and Azaria

Choon Kitt, Choon Goan, Clarence, Aliah, Derick and Kexin

Choon Kitt, Choon Goan, Clarence, Aliah, Derick and Kexin

Diane, Dianto, Nirmala, Fabious, Febrianto

Harmony, Henry, Ivan, Kelvin peh, Harmony again, Kexin

Kim hong, Marquez, Richard, Russell, Shafiq

Wow! watta blast! Juz finish my barbeque celebrating my cousin Dianto's bday. heheh.. oups... forgot to buy present for him but oh well... hope he forgot bout it. hehehe....
anyway today was ok. in e morning i came late.. hayah anyway my last day in sch, so i dun care. but after tat i really had busy time.... i go back and forward coz of e cancelling my student pass here. it cost me $50 coz of taxi fare. damnit so ma fan. hmm.. but in the end i finished my task.. and now im no more singapore resident! After tat went out with andy... man its fun eveytime going out wif him.. always intro me to new places. anyway, today shirlyn was not realyl in good moood i guess... i try to talk to her she taunted me.... keep saying dun talk to her.. coz she in sad mood. oh well.. let her alone then.. she smsed me back saying shes going malaysia. wishing me all e best. so replied her e same too.
in my outing wif andy, we went to bugis and he intro me e nice fried rice in a food court. man its fabulous.,... and salubrious! i like it! bfore tat we oso actually bought a wax and a clay for my hair. after tat we went to his secondary sch.. marist stella.. look around e sch. hmm.. its quite impressive. much better than my sch. and by e Gods... its 7 story high! damnit no wonder all marists have fit legs. i also learnt att he canned once hahah.. naughty naughty.. but i think not his fault la... coz he was punished due to e reason tat he wore long pants during soccer play... tast ridicuous. man i pity him. he also showed me where e gurkhas live.. hey not a bad place.. now i feel like bcomeing one myself. hehehe....
in the end i went home, and he went to rugby training. now to tihnk of it, i really want to join rugby.... but too bad not allowed. now i keep being bullied by those bastards saying im cowards...
after going i watched willard e movie.. about e rats heheh.. watch till halfway cousin phoned me to call me come down for w BBQ. so i came... made a few gd frens... and by Thanatos! he got a gf liao hehehhahahaha.... finally he found sumbody his own size (he's short!)
we finsh e party at 11.00... pack up everything... and he put his stuff here in my home. tomorw teh picking it up. hmm.. soon i went online.. met amanda and my buddy andy. talk togther while im updating tis damn diary. man my hand is in pain now... type too much. summore juz now my hand was slightly burnt bye damn ember. Blah!!
oh btw, i would like to show u guys some of my gd frens.. sum from sch.. sum from outside.. etc but too bad dun hav shirlyn's ... cant meet her often.. parents too strict.

here r soem of my frens: (there r 7 pages)

Song Yu, Vergustian, Yuan hong, Zhao liang
[img:45027]

woo.. yesterday i didnt update my diary, but oh well ill summarise it all. after waking up at 12, i went wif andy and sunario to open house, to see PJC around, and see sunario's face for e last time. after tat we went to vietnamese noodle place in front of lucky plaza, and ate wif em. after tat went wif harmony to watch movie for e last time. watched 'cabin fever' wow! it was nice... nicely thrilled!
forgot to say, sunario was not there... coz his aunt wan him to go home. andy get to know harmony. hahahhehehe...
after movie andy went home.... early coz mum wan him. i walk harmony home and follow her till 10++ thengo home. shes a nice girl i tell u... ^_^
and btw tat day first time i saw 9 buses wif no. 16 came at same time! wow! they come in a row! tis is 1st time i ever see such thing.... -_-
after reached home, play gunbound, and the nsleep at 3.00 am

NEXT DAY
woke up at 11.00.... stuck in toilet for an hour then go out got karaoke wif harmony at 1.50... we sang till 5 o clock.. ta t'll be last day tat im singing wif her. she has such great voice. at 5.15 we meet andy and kim hong... for a few shots. we took a few pics.... and play a few arcades (hope didnt hurt andy's feeling coz he doesnt really like arcade)
afterwards my gramps called me to go sushi tei... for dinner. i asked andy along, but in the end harmony and kim ong oso came along. it was such fun. we ate.. and e bill was $130!! wow! great deduction of money! lol... then took another few pics again for memento using my hp. it was such fun... i shall never forget u guys... hehhe.. now i must include harmony and kimhong as another few ppl tat r precious in my life. Kimhong had such tragedy happening in her life... not
gonna tell! she gonna kill me if i do! i pity her though. but i cant do anything.... im no God, im no anything powerful, or fate or wateva. blah.. i think she's a gd fren. im gonna miss her too. im also gonna miss my singing partner... wif such sweet voice.. i wont be having anymore singing partner. i will also miss andy, my best pal. anyway, i nd to sleep fast today
tomorw nd to wake up at 5.30! ok bon voyage everybody!
oh ya one more thing... my last day here is well spent. tahnx to 3 of u. ill never forget u guys. i love all of u. I'll nvr forget u all. goodbye, my frens. i wont be able to update diary daily coz indonesia doesnt hav suitabhle computer... and so i nd to use cyber cafe. tahnx again. au revoir!

these past few days was very boring. i keep having trouble fillign up my time. feel like vomiting......... also, all these days i keep finding a gd place to update tis diary, and finally i found a place! but damn these $#^@#% computers... f$%#ing slow..... makes me sick. only pentium 1! argh i wanna die keep typing. so slow.
anyway, on monday 20th october, 3 days ago five of my gd frens were there to send me off. Andy, my best pal, not forgetting Zhao liang, another gd fren of mine. Richard, Russell, and Choon goan (3 of e gang) were there too. we ate breakfast together for e last time in singapore, and took photo using andy's camera. im gonna get it soon.... when i reach back to singapore. e comp here is not trustable. blah!! man im gonna miss em all. Russell also gave me a piece of letter. oh ya.. kim hong also gave me a memento. im gonna keep these things till e end of time hehehe.... actually i wish shirlyn was there too but... oh well dun think she'll be able to make it.
her parents r too strict i must say....
these few days im really bored. bored and fustrated. e comp is so slow and i am having hard time typing.. keyboard is very bad.
i spent my days here juz reading ol comics... which made me bored outta my mind. damn tis rubbish junks!!
ok i nd to sign off already. i hav spent an hour trying to wait e loading time, finally finish uploading my entry. ok au revoir!
btw, ive got my indonesian hp. no. already! +628153151368. sms me when u see tis entry , shirlyn, andy, zhao, shafiq, richard e gang, my classmates, etc etc and many more. sms tat no.. include e 'plus' sign. its a compulsory thing. heheh... ok tata my fren!

back again to same place where i used the computer a few days ago... oh well, at least tis comp is so much better. hehehe.... hav e a few events going on during this few days. 1st, last saturday, 25th October, me ane my old frens went to Grand Angkasa hotel to celebrate hallowen's day. oh yeah it was hella fun! esp wif my old frens, who r still as funny as ever. they sure changed a lot ^_^
William Halimun, Vivian, Hendra, Hendri, and Eddy (new but friendly guy) were there. Later on Robin's brother also joined us (though i dunno his name hahaha) it was fun during e concert, e haunted house visit, and e eating time.
we finished out party at about 10.30... and Vivian, e only girl there fetched me back. hahaha.. its not surprising already coz e ppl here, once 16 are allowed to drive car... of course, they hav their driving license already.... lol... im e only one hu still learning. boooo!!! -_-
all of us carpooled... to save money. But i think vivian is always e one doing e car thing... hahahaha.. its kinda funny e only girl there kept being bullied.
a few days later, i also realized that shafiq is in hospital... suffering from severe exhaustion... now i think NS is deadly! man! now his liver isnt working properly... have to stay in hospital for a few days.. with MC of perhaps... a few weeks? im not sure. but i tried to entertain him through sms since he's so bored there. but u know wat? it eats my $ so fast! hahahah... now there's very little money left in my card. die. can't top up too fast. parents wil scold.
to sms there is about 5 times sms-ing local hp. man expensive huh? summore e network here is very sucky... sux to e core. so slow. i cant even sign into msn messenger now... damnit..
F*** shame on it!!
oh yah.. about my trip to spain... i think its cancelled coz its full! man i was loking forward to go there.... but at least my parents now decided to go korea instead. actually i dun really wan to go there.. i'd rather go back to spore and visit my frens there. i miss em all. now waiting for e visa approval... its either not we dun have e visa or we have e visa. if either of these happens, i'll be happy. if i can get e visa, ill be happy to go korea. if i dun, ill go back spore to see my fens again! but i think i prefer e second option. i really miss spore....... hehehehe.... ok now i nd to check my other stuf... i cant juz update my diary alone ya? anyway, bon voyage and see u again next time.... blah dunno when...

im gettng sick and bored here! dang! really feel like killing sumbody here.... haahah... today was kinda boring... lek e same ol day in medan... i dun hav my computer to play, i dun hav my PS2 to play too, i dun hav anything! im really bored and gonna die soon!!
argh! juz feeling like talking rubbish. talked wif shaf a few while through sms.tat funny guy.. duno wat the heck is he doing... lol...
blaH! i must leave this place or i'll get mad! $%@#!!
ok gotta go! byebye!!!